Girls...Teenage Girls

Last night I came across something rather amusing. As I was rummaging though a storage box of “Ang’s Stuff” as it is labeled I found more than one hundred notes dated from 1992 to 1997. So, as I was walking on the treadmill I read these hilarious pieces of history.

I came to this conclusion:

Girls…teenage girls are…so horribly mean, but at the same time would do anything for their best friends. They think of nothing other than boys. They are naïve with a pinch of rebelliousness. They are immature and get their feeling hurt easily. You’ll see clearly that I was one of those girls.

Although most if it cannot be repeated (shame on us) I thought it would be quite fun to share some of it with you. I will try to keep this as anonymous as possible; no names, just initials. What fun would it be to not know who wrote what? Get ready to laugh until you cry.

-“At the beginning of the note he told me not to have a cow and start thinking he likes me. As if I care if that fag likes me.” (To AMF from MTJ)

-“Dear Patty, Angela honest to God got a 100 on the science test.” (To my mom from AAA)

-“Did you hear? My mom sold Niki to this lady in Texas. Now she lives there, isn’t that great!” (To MLD from AMF)

-“Did you see Angela today? She actually fixed her hair.” (To MLD from MTJ)

-Friends may come; friends may go, but one thing I know is true. That I am lucky to have a best friend and that best friend is you.” (To AMF from KMC)

-“He loves me because he’s told me more than once to my face.” (To AMF from ?)

-I’m also sick of you saying I have bad breath or my hair looks funny. Have you ever even thought what yours looks like?” (To AMF from KMC)

-Last night _____ hit my boob on accident. I started to cry and he told me was sorry about 100 times. It didn’t really hurt. I just wanted to see what he’d do if I started to cry. It was so funny.” (To KKM from AMF)

-“My mom is cussing me out about my grades. I don’t even care though.” (To MLD from AMF)

-“She doesn’t know when to end a sentence. That pisses me off so bad.” (To ? from AMF)

-“Well, you pinched the shit out of my leg and all I did was take your stupid thing off your head. You’re just being a bitch.” (To AMF from MLD)

-“What’s the matter with you? As soon as you walk in the door you look at me like I’m the stupidest person in the world. And you wonder why I hit you.” (To AMF from KMC)

-“Yesterday on the internet I saw pictures of Jared Leto. Naked!! When I get my computer for Christmas we can look at pictures of any guy. So far I’ve seen Jared Leto, Simon Rex, Michael Jackson, Bobby Brown, R. Kelly, and Brad Pitt! Jared was the only naked though.” (To JDB from AMF)

-“You are so nosy. I’m gonna rip off your face!” (To AMF from KKM)

-“You can do better. Just because he has a car doesn’t mean he’s worth it.” (To AMF from MTJ)

-“You mutilated my horny toad, you totally destroyed my cotton field and, and, AND, you molested Toby.” (To AMF from KMC)

-“You scribble that out after you read this. Nevermind. But guess what that said. I scribbled it out because I don’t trust you.” (To AMF from KMC)

-This was a poem (?) written on the back of a note to AMF from KMC.

We used to have good times together, but now were drifting apart.
But who says friends can’t come together
Like a bulls eye and a dart?
Like Donatello and his art?
Like Kroger’s and Wal-Mart?
Like a butt and a fart?
Like blood and a heart?
Like cherries and a tart?
Like Lisa, Maggie, and Bart?

-Another poem written to AMF from KKM.

Do you hear what I hear?
Do you see what I see?
Do you smell what I smell?
What the ____ is that?

I spent most of the evening reading every single one of these notes. More than once I was referred to as Angela Fartverywell by KKM and banana girl by MTJ. Fartverywell, I get…Followell. But, banana girl does not ring a bell. I was threatened with “write back or else” on more than one occasion too. In the end, I laughed until I couldn’t breathe and even teared up a bit. Remember, these were written almost 2 decades ago. Great memories, great friends. I will never have any other like them. And although we are not as close as we used to be I still love you girls. You will always have a special place in my heart.